oldie

The guy at the computer shop played “Closing Time” to check my new purchase’s sound quality. This is my favorite song, he said. I said, Yeah, that’s a good song.

He said, You know this song?

Uh, yes.

Weh?

Uh –

I must have been in high school when this song came out.

* * *

I’m puzzled. Well, look, it’s highly probable that I was also in high school when Semisonic released this song, because we’re probably in the same age bracket. Why the hell do you look so surprised?

Do I look like I belong to the Miley Cyrus generation?

I’m offended.

* * *

Anyway. So this netbook thing. Pretty cool. I got the Lenovo S10-2, and it’s quite affordable. I was offered a free upgrade to 2 G for my RAM. I didn’t even ask. And I spent my lunch hour trying to think up ways of seducing Lenovo’s salespeople to give me something extra. (It probably wouldn’t work anyway.)

* * *

And I am officially broke in 3, 2, –

* * *

At least now I can safely retire my trusty Toshiba that has served me for more than five years. It’s still working, but there’s gunk on the screen and it emits this weird smell when I open it (hopelessness, probably, the smell of old technology). Also, it only has 30 G as hard disk memory. And only one USB port.

But at least it has a floppy disk drive.

* * *

See, if you remember goddamn floppy disks, you’d know “Closing Time” and Walkmans and Discmans and buying cassette tapes at the record store because they’re cheaper than the CDs and listening to the Top 40 on the FM radio every morning and not really understanding what Wi-Fi is. Internet access with no cables? What? Get out a here.

Unlike this idiot.

* * *

It gets kinda scary when some people don’t know the things you know. People who don’t know what floppy disks are are being born every day. It’s a damn invasion. Now I know what my father felt when somebody said “Brooke Shields” and he said “Blue Lagoon” or whatever the heck film that was, and I said “Suddenly Susan”. We were mystified and scared by the things we didn’t know.

* * *

I suddenly realized how sucky our office internet connection really was when I tried the Wi-Fi in the condo, and it allowed me to Tweet faster. I mean, it’s Wi-Fi, it’s not even WiMAX.

Don’t tell me you don’t know what WiMAX is. Google it. You’ll have a nerdgasm.