AGNI Online: What Depresses Me by Juanita Brunk.
I vowed to document every memorable piece I read online or offline, so I’m sharing this.
or to all that comes and goes, people
and things that arrive
and then vanish
with a brevity that might, on another day,
from another heart, more valiant,
less fickle,
appear as radiance,
and the grief, praise.
So beautiful it melts the heart.
I lost a kilo (2.2 pounds) since I last weighed!
Jaykie and I might go to boxing sessions after February! (Thanks Kate for the tip!)
I’m starting to feel excited about that trip!
Thank goodness that black cloud decided not to hover. Now maybe soon I can start writing again.
Shameless plug: My page and Usok interview are now up on Rocket Kapre. Thanks Paolo C. for all the hard work!
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This week’s “weekend” started on Wednesday for me. I used up my accumulated days-off after working for nine straight days (!).
On Wednesday I was finally able to introduce Jaykie to my friend, Eula. Pancake House at Market Market + Girbaud (I bought a wallet for my father) + Payless (I bought shoes!) + CBTL at High Street before heading home.
I like Payless. Shoes are relatively cheap and are arranged according to size. So you need only know your size and stay in front of that shelf trying things on.
I bought a pair of purple flats. I have a lot of purple things, but no purple shoes yet.
Jaykie bought leather shoes.
Payless gave us a huge-ass paper bag, haha.
Thanks Eula for the earrings!
Eula and her mom have an online shop by the way. They sell earrings, headbands, and bags. Check out Chic Collective. :)
On Thursday I went jogging in UP. I miss jogging here. I used to jog here all the time, back when I still lived in UP Bliss. Jaykie and I are planning to make a weekly habit out of it. (He wasn’t with me that Thursday though; he had class.)
I wasn’t too fond of Friday and Saturday. Too many blue notes. There’s that trip in February to either look forward to or watch with dread as it approaches. Ah, money. Ah, schedule. It’s awful to feel awful about a looming vacation.
Wish the following weeks are happier.
The bullet is already in the brain; it won’t be outrun forever, or charmed to a halt. In the end it will do its work and leave the troubled skull behind, dragging its comet’s tail of memory and hope and talent and love into the marble hall of commerce. That can’t be helped.
– “Bullet in the Brain”, Tobias Wolff
Wolff’s “Bullet in the Brain” is one of those stories that, no matter how many times I read it, will always bowl me over. Here, Anders, an obnoxious critic waiting in line inside a bank, is shot at close-range. But that’s not the story. The story unfolds as the bullet, travelling “at a pathetically sluggish, glacial pace”, moves through the man’s brain and sets off a single recollection. Just that one beautiful, simple recollection, that stays with him until his (presumable) death. Anders is one of those acerbic, annoying people I wouldn’t even want to meet, but in this story, I mourn for him. The story makes me re-check my early judgment. How little we know of other people! So little that what we think we understand doesn’t even count. If seen from outside, the shooting scene would have only made me scoff (and maybe even say, He had it coming?), but Wolff took readers inside Ander’s head, inside scenes of his life, his regrets, his sadness. Wolff writes with such a forgiving eye and a tender perspective that he makes us see, especially through this story, that there is something to mourn for in every person, even one who seems to have no humanity left in him. How unfair that the bullet can’t be outrun forever! How awful that it can’t be charmed to a halt!
(And I wouldn’t even talk about technique; it’s clear that a writer who is able to convey all of this in a few pages is a genius.)
Read Bullet in the Brain here.
And then read Our Story Begins, because “Bullet in the Brain”‘s just one gem out of many. I have yet to finish the New Stories section, but I can say this: this is one of the best, if not the best, short story collection I have ever read.
I weighed myself two hours ago, and I weighed 70 kilos (154 pounds). Taking my height into consideration (5’6″, or 167.64 cms.), and keeping in mind that I am Asian (our healthy BMI is lower than that of Americans) I am overweight.
I remember weighing only 120 in 2003, first year of college. So this is of course very depressing.
Diet plus exercise. I’ll weigh myself again on the 30th. Gah. I really want to go back to 120 pounds again.
Got this from Andrea! Answer if you feel like it – I’m curious.
I told my father not to buy firecrackers anymore for very obvious reasons, and I was glad he followed my order advice. The paper was put to bed early so I was able to take the office shuttle to Cubao and get on a bus by 6:30 p.m. When I reached home (8:30 or so) some house was blasting the neighborhood with ear-splitting music. That house turned out to be our house.
My father, who was already drunk, had set up his sound system on the terrace. Minutes later I heard my father singing. An hour later he started deejaying. No shit. “Happy New Year!” he’d shout, then he’d play an 80’s song. “Good song, good song!” At one point the volume was turned up so high my sister handed him my brother’s headphones to protect his ears. Then we closed the door to the terrace while he’s inside because we couldn’t hear ourselves think. Haha! He didn’t mind. He was bopping his head to the music when we went downstairs to drink.
My brother became quite talkative (and dizzy) after his third glass. Every now and then my father would come downstairs (still wearing the headphones) and practically bellow at us, saying that he loved our mother! And that my brothers will never find a woman as precious as her! And my sister and I will never find a guy as handsome as him!
Okay! Calm down!
Craziest media noche ever.
And we didn’t even have firecrackers.
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Also brought home my compli copy of the Inquirer book.
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The night of January 1 was time well spent with Jaykie’s family. I enjoyed the macaroni salad!
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I should really take note of the stories I read online.
Fiction find
“re: The Last Man on Earth” from Expanded Horizons
Eliza Victoria 